My husband and I have a habit of asking each other very pointed questions at seemingly random times. We met online, and before we actually met in person, we spent three weeks texting, chatting, messaging, and talking on the phone. We got to know each other quite well without actually having seen each other.
Random Q & A Day
One day, about three days before we had made a date to meet in person for the first time, I declared a “random question and answer day.” We each gave ourselves free reign to ask any question we wanted, and the other person had to answer honestly, all of this without judgment. I learned a lot about my man that day. And since then, we have always felt free to ask each other any question and know we would get an honest answer.
The other day, standing in the living room one evening, I randomly said, “Do you regret marrying me?” Without hesitation or any sign of wondering if I had any ulterior motives for asking, he simply answered, “Sometimes, yes.” I replied, “Me too.” Then we looked at each other and laughed. It turned into a conversation about how far we’ve come in our lives, in our marriage, and how much we really love each other and wouldn’t have things any other way.
Always Open and Honest
Being able to express ourselves freely doesn’t mean that we can do or say anything to each other, even if it is hurtful. In fact, it has meant the opposite for us. We have learned to be respectful of each other, considerate of each other’s feelings, and be non-judgmental of each other. Honest communication has left no ambiguity in our relationship, and has helped us to both feel free to be ourselves. Are there still difficult moments? Of course. But they are made much easier through openness and honesty in all things.